Tuesday, September 20, 2005
9th Sep 2005 ~ 12th Sep 2005: Part Two - Mother's Love
I was a Swimming Champion.
And although that was some years ago, there will always be a part of me that remembers my accomplishments. I remember that time when I marched to my school’s swimming meet (which honestly wasn’t a big deal) with the main student body instead of taking the competitors’ transport, and getting ready for my first event the minute I reached the pool. Not that I was arrogant, but because I knew that I would still have enough energy for my six events even after the march (plus such a thing was new to me as I take the transport year after year). Oh. I got six gold medals that day. Haha.
So you can see how Swimming is a large part of me and how it is the make up of most of my self worth. So when a sports person says, “Without Swimming, I am nothing.” You should probably trust him. But after saying so much, there is an even great power that I owe everything that I had to. The one who brought me to trainings twice every week (when I was still a boy), the one who was there for every competition – big or small, the one who will sit at the gallery doing nothing for two hours every training session, and the one who fought with my teacher in charge because the teacher refused to put me in the training group with those upper primary kids - because (honestly) the kids my age is a little too slow for me.
So essentially, without my mommy, I am nothing.
Primary school years were so far away from now. And I had grew up in my own ways, some like how my mom had hoped for, others not. And one of the most drastic decisions I had made so far was to apply for an overseas attachment this year. I had only told everyone about the job after I was accepted. I guess this took my mom off guard somehow. Somehow I had wanted to do this for me. And I was afraid that she would sway my decision. Do note that everyone has a Parent Voice inside us. And sometimes we act the way we do because we couldn’t help but follow our Parent Voice’s instructions (This I have learnt from the two Psychology Classes I took). My mom has great effect over me. And I must say that I grew up in the golden days (as compared to my siblings). When I was growing up, my mother didn't intent to depend on anyone (dawn, can you remember those days?). And anything she lacks, she makes up with resourcefulness. She was forceful and refused to let anyone bully her children or her. Guess this is why I am somewhat different compared to my siblings. I am driven and domineering while they are more peace loving people.
Anyway, after two months of working in Thailand, my family flew over to visit me. And boy did my mom come with a vengeance. 
She packed a luggage full of goodies – my favorite NTUC potato chips, chocolates, biscuits, moon cakes, BBQ pork (which she took great pains to cut the slices into smaller pieces and pack them in zip lock bags, 
so I can eat the meat easier),and even cooked my favorite pig’s trotters and preserved vegetables. This is obviously ridiculous and impractical. 
But this is a mother’s love. I believe that there are only a few Loves in this world that will be in such excess that it becomes outrageous. The only I have found so far are my mother’s love for me and my siblings’ love for me.
One fear that I always have is that I wouldn't be able to give my mom a comfortable life. Although I have never told her. But I have quietly decided that she has suffered too much. And I want to one day provide for her in ways that people frown upon - that she can buy anything she wants without having second thoughts.
Money has always given my mom a great deal of headache and I never found out the full extent until I got older. There were toys in my childhood, but not plenty. So I say that those situations could have further develop my resourcefulness and creativity.
I seem to can't write adequately for this piece. Maybe some things are better left inside. I Love You, Mommy.
p.s. Do go have a read at my sister's blog entry. She wrote a wonderful piece on mommy too. I love it a lot. It moved me a lot.
Almost forgot! I had to buy this 85litres bag to bring my food back. And it wasn't quite big enough. Mommy had to bring a packet of fruits back. When I eventually got my food supply back to the factory (I was quite grumpy initially because I had to carry THAT for my one and a half hour journey back to the factory), I realised how much my mommy loves me :)
And although that was some years ago, there will always be a part of me that remembers my accomplishments. I remember that time when I marched to my school’s swimming meet (which honestly wasn’t a big deal) with the main student body instead of taking the competitors’ transport, and getting ready for my first event the minute I reached the pool. Not that I was arrogant, but because I knew that I would still have enough energy for my six events even after the march (plus such a thing was new to me as I take the transport year after year). Oh. I got six gold medals that day. Haha.
So you can see how Swimming is a large part of me and how it is the make up of most of my self worth. So when a sports person says, “Without Swimming, I am nothing.” You should probably trust him. But after saying so much, there is an even great power that I owe everything that I had to. The one who brought me to trainings twice every week (when I was still a boy), the one who was there for every competition – big or small, the one who will sit at the gallery doing nothing for two hours every training session, and the one who fought with my teacher in charge because the teacher refused to put me in the training group with those upper primary kids - because (honestly) the kids my age is a little too slow for me.
So essentially, without my mommy, I am nothing.
Primary school years were so far away from now. And I had grew up in my own ways, some like how my mom had hoped for, others not. And one of the most drastic decisions I had made so far was to apply for an overseas attachment this year. I had only told everyone about the job after I was accepted. I guess this took my mom off guard somehow. Somehow I had wanted to do this for me. And I was afraid that she would sway my decision. Do note that everyone has a Parent Voice inside us. And sometimes we act the way we do because we couldn’t help but follow our Parent Voice’s instructions (This I have learnt from the two Psychology Classes I took). My mom has great effect over me. And I must say that I grew up in the golden days (as compared to my siblings). When I was growing up, my mother didn't intent to depend on anyone (dawn, can you remember those days?). And anything she lacks, she makes up with resourcefulness. She was forceful and refused to let anyone bully her children or her. Guess this is why I am somewhat different compared to my siblings. I am driven and domineering while they are more peace loving people.
Anyway, after two months of working in Thailand, my family flew over to visit me. And boy did my mom come with a vengeance. 
She packed a luggage full of goodies – my favorite NTUC potato chips, chocolates, biscuits, moon cakes, BBQ pork (which she took great pains to cut the slices into smaller pieces and pack them in zip lock bags, 
so I can eat the meat easier),and even cooked my favorite pig’s trotters and preserved vegetables. This is obviously ridiculous and impractical. 
But this is a mother’s love. I believe that there are only a few Loves in this world that will be in such excess that it becomes outrageous. The only I have found so far are my mother’s love for me and my siblings’ love for me.One fear that I always have is that I wouldn't be able to give my mom a comfortable life. Although I have never told her. But I have quietly decided that she has suffered too much. And I want to one day provide for her in ways that people frown upon - that she can buy anything she wants without having second thoughts.
Money has always given my mom a great deal of headache and I never found out the full extent until I got older. There were toys in my childhood, but not plenty. So I say that those situations could have further develop my resourcefulness and creativity.
I seem to can't write adequately for this piece. Maybe some things are better left inside. I Love You, Mommy.
p.s. Do go have a read at my sister's blog entry. She wrote a wonderful piece on mommy too. I love it a lot. It moved me a lot.
Almost forgot! I had to buy this 85litres bag to bring my food back. And it wasn't quite big enough. Mommy had to bring a packet of fruits back. When I eventually got my food supply back to the factory (I was quite grumpy initially because I had to carry THAT for my one and a half hour journey back to the factory), I realised how much my mommy loves me :)
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