Friday, April 14, 2006
Events I Keep In My Heart
After writing about the 5 people I meet in Heaven, I thought of the incidents that changed my life.There was the time when I was maybe 9 years old. Friends were teasing about Lisun and me. I was very angry and wanted everyone to stop. I think I was crying even. And Lisun was telling me to ignore them but I didn't. She got so annoyed that she forced my head to turn to face her and said, "Stop it!"
I realised the meaning of having a best friend. He/ she doesn't leave you behind.
I had participated in all sorts of swimming competitions. I win some, I lose some. But the race that established my confidence as a competitive swimmer wasn't the time when I got 6 or 7 gold medals, nor was it the time when I won a bronze despite competing against faster and more well-trained swimmers. It was the training sessions I had when I was 10 years old. I was training with the senior boys who are twice my size. At first they won me by half a second. So I told myself the next time we swim, I'll be as fast as they are. And when I achieved that, I had to win them by half a second.
Lessons learnt:
^ Mere physical training does nothing for competitions. It's the mental strength that matters.
^ If you don't want, you will never get.
Then there was the time when I was about 18 years old, my sister asked me, "You have a choice, right?"
I realised that we like to play victim too much.
"He took advantage of me!"
"She made me buy this useless junk."
I realised that even when I had let a bad thing happen to me, it was my choice.
So no whinning, no tears on the shirt. And get to work! hee.
Then there was national service.
It was no fun. But I think boys really become men.
I always think the army wasted me away. Boys go in and come out fitter.
I came out with an injured leg, learnt tons about office politics and shelved the swimmer-gage away.
The next turning point would be NTU Sports Club. Discovered the people-gage. As many know, I never have much energy to invest in small talks. "Hi, How's the party so far?", "I'm Gage, blah blah blah of Sports Club. Would you like me to show you around?" Never knew how to do these before being a part of Sport Club.
My parents' divorce. It got me thinking a lot about partnerships and marriages. Still don't know how much I'll need it. But I'm definitely not looking forward to it. Seems to me that the end will be very messy and troublesome. But if I will have a family eventually, we will have separate saving accounts. Money always bring out the worst in people.
Finally, the drinking session at Happy Dayz when I was back from Thailand to renew my working visa in October 2005.
I had been a bitter gage for a few years. Didn't seem to find love around. Now that I see it, I was too blind. Love has always been around. Jayna told me that I am happier now compared to years before. And I teased her, "Then I have to thank friends like you." She said, "I always knew that that was a phase. You will be alright in the end."
I never am good in the love department. But I wanna thank Lisun, Wenqiang, Jiahui aka Jayna, CK, Sze aka Gareth, Vicky, Adrian, Yingkai, Qijin, Xiushan, Peishan, Cherng Yang aka James and Julian. In a way you guys are my lovers all along. Through the good and bad times. You guys never gave up on me. Thank you all.
Labels: Gage'sWritings, Thoughts
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My other half gets mad at me if I bring up anything from my past, but look, that's where all of R lessons R learned! Luv'd the post!
:)
:)
# posted by 
: Friday, April 14, 2006 7:26:00 pm
: Friday, April 14, 2006 7:26:00 pm
Have you heard of the story about a man who died in the car boot. He was kidnapped and put into the car boot.He did many attempts to escape but failed. When police were investigating the case, they realised that he could just reach out from a hole and undo the boot. It was obvious from the outside but cos he was in the boot, he failed to realise it even when that car belongs to him.
And I read a book about genuius. To these people there is always possibilities to win an impossible case.I always remember one of the way, that is, to change the target. For example, to be an excellent student you have to score 100% but you lower to 90%. The first instance, I yell 'Play Cheat!'. I read that book 2 years ago, now I tell you. In Life, things change. Therefore targets too. Why always play THE game by another's rules? Why not Your Rules? The summary of the book : Genuius win cos they recognise the constants and variables in Life, that is, targets are constant and hence the rest shall be variables. The qn is what are your rules. How many variables do you want? What do you want? Like you say, you won't get it if you don't want it. So how much do you want it? What will be the price?
I wrote this comment cos I have learnt the rules long ago but never the trick. I know the choice is yours but I have always leave it to God. I have always wanted but never too badly. I am cheap skate in all aspects -- too high a price, I can't pay. And I think my brothers won't be very hard nuts too. But in Life, sometimes learn to think out of the car boot. Sometimes learn to look to the other side or look away. Sometimes change the variables. But of course, have your constants -- the targets, your name (that you will live with forever. Might not be your wife but your name. Remember Cruible.), your family, your friends and yourself. Never give up on you. The real you...
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And I read a book about genuius. To these people there is always possibilities to win an impossible case.I always remember one of the way, that is, to change the target. For example, to be an excellent student you have to score 100% but you lower to 90%. The first instance, I yell 'Play Cheat!'. I read that book 2 years ago, now I tell you. In Life, things change. Therefore targets too. Why always play THE game by another's rules? Why not Your Rules? The summary of the book : Genuius win cos they recognise the constants and variables in Life, that is, targets are constant and hence the rest shall be variables. The qn is what are your rules. How many variables do you want? What do you want? Like you say, you won't get it if you don't want it. So how much do you want it? What will be the price?
I wrote this comment cos I have learnt the rules long ago but never the trick. I know the choice is yours but I have always leave it to God. I have always wanted but never too badly. I am cheap skate in all aspects -- too high a price, I can't pay. And I think my brothers won't be very hard nuts too. But in Life, sometimes learn to think out of the car boot. Sometimes learn to look to the other side or look away. Sometimes change the variables. But of course, have your constants -- the targets, your name (that you will live with forever. Might not be your wife but your name. Remember Cruible.), your family, your friends and yourself. Never give up on you. The real you...
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